


clinging onto your heart

by Snowy_Cas



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Fluffy Boys, Light Angst, M/M, Post-Magic Reveal, Sad with a Happy Ending, Short & Sweet, oh the fluff, yknow
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-26
Updated: 2020-10-26
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:20:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 951
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27201014
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Snowy_Cas/pseuds/Snowy_Cas
Summary: Merlin decides that he can no longer stay in Camelot, but Arthur won't let him leave.
Relationships: Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)
Comments: 9
Kudos: 239





	clinging onto your heart

"So, yeah," Merlin said slowly. His head was hung down to face the floor, and to avoid whatever look was on Arthur's face. The tightness in his chest grew with every second that passed. He nervously gripped his satchel and adjusted the strap, awaiting a response. When there was none, he sighed and started, "Well, I suppose this is g-"

"Don't."

Merlin glanced up.

Arthur was biting back tears. He hadn't moved a muscle or said a word since Merlin told him about his magic. At first, Merlin was relieved by the lack of shouting, no angry outburst, and no sign of the reprimanding Merlin had always expected when he revealed his secret, but the silence was impossibly worse. The air hung heavy with the tension of words unspoken.

The prince swallowed hard, and shakily continued, "Don't say goodbye."

"You don't understand," Merlin scoffed, maintaining his eye contact with Arthur. The tears weren't far from falling now. "I have to. I can't stay here any longer, Arthur, especially now that you know. It's not only for me, it's for you, too. I couldn't keep lying to you, but I don't want to put you under this kind of pressure."

"Pressure?" Arthur shook his head, confused.

"If I stay, you'll have to make the decision to tell your father or not. To be loyal to the kingdom, or help a friend," Merlin explained. "I know there's so much you already have to deal with, so I'm trying to make it easier by leaving. You won't ever have to see me again, I promise." He shuffled his feet.

He hated doing this more than he could say, but it was what needed to be done. The more time he spent in Camelot, the more lies he had to tell, the more weight he had put on his shoulders, the more he had to betray his best friend. This way, he'd be free, even if abandoning his home was going to leave a gaping hole in his heart. Merlin would miss the people, he'd miss waking up to smell of Gaius' cooking and teasing the knights during training. He was going to miss waking Arthur up in the morning, seeing him smile at Merlin's jokes, hearing the comforting sound of his voice. 

God, he was going to miss Arthur so much. 

Merlin wasn't going to let his heart get broken any more today, so he quickly nodded to Arthur and turned to leave the chambers before Arthur could say anything else. He could hear Arthur walking behind him but ignored it and put his hand on the handle of the chamber door. He only got it an inch open when Arthur grabbed his shoulder and swung him back around. His eyes were red-rimmed and a single tear slipped down his face.

"I won't tell my father," he insisted desperately.

"Arthur, it doesn't matter anymore, I'm leaving," Merlin placed his hand on top of Arthur's, squeezing it tight.

"No," Arthur refused. "You're not leaving, I can't let you." Merlin started to respond, but Arthur cut him off. "I know you Merlin, and I know you mean no harm with your magic. You can stay. I'll always protect you, no matter what happens, but you can't leave. I have to have you here with me, do you understand?" His voice was hoarse. "Hell, I can barely get through a single day when you're gone, how am I supposed to do it for the rest of my life?"

"You'll get another manservant-"

"That's not the point!" Arthur took his hand off of Merlin's shoulders and crossed his arms in front of his chest. Merlin backed up a little, now directly against the doors. Arthur blurted out, "You can't leave because I care about you!" Merlin's features softened. Arthur didn't seem to notice and continued on his rant, "Because the thought of not having you by my side is too painful to think about, and because I need you, Merlin, more than anything in this world."

"Arthur..."

"So I don't care what it takes or what I have to do, you're staying," He finished, his chest rising and falling with heavy breaths. 

Merlin reached out a hand to the side of Arthur's face and asked, "Do you really mean that?"

He emphasized, "Really."

Not even a second later, Merlin crashed his lips against Arthur's. He tangled his fingers in the prince's hair as he deepened the kiss, eagerly biting Arthur's bottom lip and leaving hardly any time for a breath. He pulled Arthur towards him so that Merlin was tightly pressed against the door. The kiss was passionate and needy, as if Merlin was going to die the very next minute. He was making the most out of every little movement. Eventually, though, Merlin did need air, so he pulled back. Arthur looked absolutely dumbstruck. His eyes were wide and his mouth agape. Merlin's face was instantly hot and he could feel the flush of pink on his cheeks.

"Oh my god, I'm sorry, I didn't-"

This time Arthur initiated the kiss. It was softer, less rushed. Arthur placed a calloused hand under Merlin's jaw, tilting his head upwards into a more comfortable position. He gently kissed Merlin lips, then his nose, and then pressed a long one to Merlin's forehead. Merlin closed his eyes and let Arthur do everything he needed to do. After the forehead kiss, Arthur took Merlin's hand in his and gave his knuckles one final kiss, making Merlin laugh slightly. He then wrapped his arms around Arthur's neck and they rested their heads together.

"So does this mean you're staying, then?" Arthur murmured.

Merlin smiled, and said, "Of course I am, you clotpole."

**Author's Note:**

> they so cute oh my god  
> anyways enjoy some nice caring arthur and merlin! we do be gettin a happy ending  
> if only i could say the same for my next fic >:)


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